Competition Among The Young

You find it so hard to watch your children in some situations. You try to make sports fun. But even in making it fun it still find hurt and you just want to fix it for them. It not only hurts them it hurts the parents who watch the kids hurt. It hurts more when they are told oh we will do this for you, and you are guaranteed to get this and be here and oh no you didn't or no there had to be a change and the saddeness that comes over them. You try to pick up their broken hearts. You try to tell them next time but when next time keeps coming and they fail again where do you go from there?
Sports is competitive there just is no way around it. In soccer there is even levels, gold the best, silver and then bronze. I did not know about gold until we already had my daughter signed up. This summer we are going for gold because it's what she wants, but part of me fears that rejection. She was sure she was playing gold for last competitions but she got put on silver and she is so upset because she was told she was being recommended for gold.
I don't know if it was just the way I played sports when I was younger or if things have really changed but I don't remember things being so hard and competitive when it's supposed to just be fun.
My other daughter feels so let down because they worked their butts off for cheerleading competition and got all their tumble routines done right and still got 4th place when they did worse last time and were higher placed. Apparently different people judging. Some judges are harder than others. In cheerleading I think it's harsh. I don't remember our cheerleaders having it so strict. She can't cut her hair, has to have no real colouring to her hair. No piercings. No nail polish no nothing pretty much. Every little thing wrong with them causes deductions in their scores. Some coaches are really harsh some are a little less but still way more strict then I remember and the cost is over the roof.
I went to Widdifield High I believe our school had something like 35 cheerleaders on our team. Out here in BC cheerleading is a recreational thing. It is not something schools are really involved with. Which I find so sad. I think it would have done alot for her to have that at school.
Her sister is lucky because she is a major jock she is on the track and field and basketball and soccer team. The teachers ask her to do artwork for things. Jocks generally will always have a groupie of friends. My cheerleader is much less personality then her. She is really struggling at her fathers and I am seriously considering bringing her back home. I told her we will see how the summer goes.
DJ is just a natural friend of everyone. Never been into sports. Always hoped he would be. His dad was a jock. Just not that type of boy. He is a gamer and a techie more a gamer. He likes movies and games. He is awesome with kids. So proud of him making leader this summer. So so proud. His dad worked at summer camps too so it's one thing he would have in common with Bryan. He though has always made friends wherever he has gone, never had a problem making friends. He loves to laugh and have fun and he can be deep when needed. He thinks ALOT! I think he will be a really wonderful adult. I can see how much he's grown just in the past year. He's not a little boy anymore. Hard to believe in 2 days he will be 16yrs on the 20th:) The year of learning to drive I told him:)
So I really am curious how do other parents deal with their kids and competition? How do you hide your own heartache and help them with yours? Sometimes I want to scream and say wtf? I have had to seperate myself and let Phil go with Sarah to soccer. I do get rather worked up. So they have that as a bond. But even with that I still get worked up. Hearing either of my girls disappointment and feeling like the coaches aren't doing them right it hurts and I really do suffer with keeping my mouth shut. I have however took it out on Phil. It's not fair to do that but I can get mad about it to him and get mad when he sticks up for the reasons. I mean he gets upset too but he does try to see the reason behind it and I use that to pounce on him. I know I am doing it when I am doing it but I just feel so frustrated.
With the schools when things happen I am the parent that the teachers get to know real well. I can be their nightmare. My kids have even said ok mom backoff, enough. I don't think enough people take the crap that happens at school seriously. I had alot happen to me at school and I have alot of anger and resentment and still can cry about certain events and I will NEVER allow that shit to happen to my kids. Some teachers think they are entailed to the world. Not with my kids, not with me around. Phil fights with me about that too. He thinks I am too hard on the teachers. But I don't care, no one will ever do what they did to me or my brother for that matter. Mr.Lisk he did something to me that took me years to talk about and wh3en I finally did I cried and cried and cried. I despise him and what he did was abuse.
There need to be more teachers like Mrs.Yates, and Mrs.White two of my favorite teachers in school. Mr.Lisk, Mr.Mosier both military school teachers in Kingston Ontario were bad teachers but Mr.Lisk what he got away with I am still scarred with and I still cry about and I am now 34 that was grade 4 or 5. It was an abuse of power I hate him!!! K I gotta go now am crying...