Saturday, December 13, 2008

help me find him, help help me find him...

So I am sitting here at 6:33am so exhausted words cannot describe but scared if I go to sleep something more will happen with Daryll and Mary. Last night was bigtime eventful. Mary's wall now has 2 holes it thanks to Daryll. He said he hit the wall so he didn't hit her, good choice either way still a violent reaction. However she took all his clothes into the bathroom so he couldn't pack them and it took me about 10 mins to get to her and get him his clothes. Oh it was over her dead body that he was going back to Port. God she reminds me so much of how things went down with her father and I. She has had a headache all day as when Daryll hit the wall she banged her head on the wall she probably gave herself a mild concusion.
Daryll is only supposed to go home for 3 days, however like me at her age and well into my 20's she's panicking that he won't come back and he'll be with someone new. She's worried he'll cheat on her all the time even when he is here. She won't listen when we try to tell her she's making it worse by yelling and screaming at him everytime he says no to someonething, blocking him from leaving her room and/or house and puting him down. I do try to talk to Daryll when he escapes her and is either in tears or so upset or choked he sits down down here. Like I told him today she's never really dealt with the emotion of fear when she gets the emotion fear she deals with it by changing it to anger and having inappropriate behaviour so you have to try and remember that. They do badly need to learn how to deal w2ith one another when anger comes up cause one of them is going to cause major damage to the other if don't do something now.
So we went to mayfair today, Saw DJ omg GIRLS if you want A GORGEOUS, SWEET, LOVING GUY my son is 17 and GORGEOUS he is finally NICELY FORMING OUT. OMG HE IS HOT! i AM SO PROUD TO BE HIS MOMMY:) He has a winter formal coming up but doesn't have a date for it, may just go with the guys. So if your in his age bracket and you are single or know a sweet gal send her DJ's way. He works at Mayfair, he goes to Spectrum high, he GRADUATES this yea 2009r. His bday is in Feb is a pisces and will be 18. He has come a long long way in his life. He deserves a major award just for being my child. I really really wish we could track down his dad before he graduates. DJ has asked me to try and write his dad 1 more time. If anyone out there could help me get that info for me and we could give it to my son you have no idea how hugely a gift that would be for my son, wouldn't couldn't describe it.
Info I can give that I know about DJ's dad:
Born in Ontario(london ont I think but not sure, but was ont)
BRYAN LAURENCE MILLER
Believe his parents names are: Donald & Mary Miller they reside in North Bay Ontario
Siblings(I'm not 100% sure but I think they are):
Kevin(went to queens university*I think*), Mark, Andrea?
They owned McDonalds(I know they had 1, then I was told 2, and then I heard 3. Last I heard recently they sold them & are now retired)
Parents still live in the same house by Lake nippissing glen drive something like that, it was being renovated when I was visiting there
I believe his bday is July 29/72 (not 100% on that but I am sure that is pretty close if not bang on)
He went to Scollard Hall (sp?) High School, he often wore his jacket from there
He played on the football team from the school
In his room I believe he had a collection of pop cans around his bed for the life of me I cannot remember if it was coke or pepsi I didn't go right into the room just in the hallway
He went to france after grade 12 to do his last year of school june 1990 graduation
I believe he went to the western university of ontario would have been sept 1991
Bryan was a major jock but not into basketball
Chocolate gave him an easy high
Last I heard Bryan may have been residing in Ottawa but I can't say for sure. I also heard he recently got married.
he liked to play minigolf, that was actually our first date and we shared a chocolate shake and chocolate sunday; oddly enough chocolate gets DJ a high as well
DJ has known about Bryan all of his life. Anything & everything I could remember DJ knows about. I believe kids need to be told the truth. It bothers me when kids have like 3-4 and more dad's. You can have other dad figures but your father is your father. PERIOD. They can be an ass or worse but he's still your dad. Same goes for mom. *sigh*
DJ is now the age his father was when we got pregnant with DJ. I've told DJ it was 1 time, that 3teens do stupid things and don't always think things through. I also remind him that he's now 17 almost 18 think about his friends and him and it's not hard to imagine that things sometimes go too far. I know I should have not given in to the nonstop pushing and pushed back and said no out loud not just in my head. That night is so clear in my head I relive it alot I hate it because once it starts I can't stop it I have to finish replaying it and I just cry and throw up. He looks just like his dad right now and getting a bigger chest that's what he was missing he is finally filling out he's so happy and I am so proud. Mary says he's getting fat. NOT NICE MARY!
We're supposed to get snow tomorrow I love snow but not here, BC drivers cannot drive:(
Anyhow am off for now. Hey if you spot any fairies, tell them this single mom would love to shake their wands and remind santa to visit me, yes?/no? maybe? :( and the elves can come clean up here cause Mary and I are in too much pain to be moving much and that truly sucks:( hopefully ultrasound will find the culprit and we can the screwup and then I can be normal again stupid pain and when it shoots holdy crap it shoots like hell!